Parsha Shoftim – Torah, Jewish Teaching & Approaching Elul: What Does HaShem Actually Want From You?

For a Jewish person Elul can feel overwhelming. We look back at the year, see the same weaknesses, the same struggles and the same failures and wonder: what does HaShem actually expect from us?

Every Elul we start again. Through Torah wisdom we think about what needs to change, what we should be doing better, our Jewish values, our Judaism, and the person we ought to become.

In this Torah study, one passuk in Parsha Shoftim suggests that HaShem may be asking us for something rather different. And the clue lies in one Hebrew word thats meaning is very easily misunderstood.

As we approach the Yamim Noraim, perhaps we have been asking ourselves the wrong question. What if one of the biggest mistakes we make during Elul is trying too hard to become better?

Parshat Shoftim contains a deceptively simple instruction that takes us from Avraham Avinu to Ya’akov, from astrology to Har Sinai, and ultimately to a very different understanding of what HaShem actually wants from us.

Transcript

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Schmuel arrives for a job interview. The interviewer says, We're looking for someone extremely responsible. Schmuel says you found him. Really? asked the interviewer. Absolutely. At my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they always said I was responsible. The interviewer frowns and looks at Schmuel CV. What would you say is your biggest weakness? Schmuel responds, honesty. I don't think honesty's a weakness, says the interviewer. I don't care what you think, replies Schmuel. Pasha Shoftim is always read at the beginning of El. Ell is a time when we start to become a little more introspective as we prepare for the Yamim Noraim. Asking ourselves how much we have really changed since last year can be a difficult question. I still get angry. I still waste time. I still struggle with the same mitzvot. I still say things I shouldn't. My davening still isn't what it should be. I still need to improve certain relationships. We often hold ourselves up to a high standard which we struggle to fulfil. There are Sadikim, there are Gudolim, and then there's me. So what does Hashem expect from an ordinary flawed human being? In this week's pasha we have the Pasuk Tamim to Hiyaim Hashem Elokeha, which means you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God. Let's explore what that Pasuk might mean. In so doing, I think we may discover some ideas which can assist us on our journey during this month. We are often advised to look at Uncleus if we want to understand the Pashat, the plain meaning of the text. There are principally three times in Torah when Tamim or Tam is used in reference to an individual. In Pashat Noach it says, Noach Sadik Tamim Hayabadorat. Noach was a righteous man, Tamim in his generations. In Pashat Lechlacha, Hashem says to Avraham, Hitalekhlafanai Tamim, walk with me and be tamim. And in Pashat Toldoch, to describe Yaqov it says, Yaakov Ish Tam Yoshev or Halim. Yakov was a tam man, taman dwelling in tents. Each time Unkulus translates tamim or tam as shalim. This is the Aramaic of the Hebrew word shalem, which is best translated as whole or complete. So in our Pasuk in this week's pasha, we're being told, Tamim Tehiye im Hashem Elokecha, which means you shall be Tamim, whole or complete with Hashem your God. Interestingly enough, Tamim is often translated as perfect, but of course no one is perfect, not Noah, and not even the greatest of Siddiqim like Avraham and Yaakov. Clearly Al Pasuk in this week's Pasha is not telling all of Klali Israel to be perfect. Rabbiakov Yitzak Horowitz, the seer or the visionary of Lublin, once asked, should a person strive for greatness or wholeness? He explained using the example of two chalot. One halah is enormous, beautiful and impressive, but somebody has cut a slice from it. Beside it is a smaller chalah. It is not impressive, but it's whole. Which one do we take for Lechemishnah to make a motsian shabbat or hug? The smaller whole halah, because sometimes wholeness or completeness matters more than greatness. So we have our starting point. Tamim does not mean perfect, it means whole. The question now is, what does a whole or complete human being actually look like? In Chovot Halavot, duties of the heart, Rabinu Bhakya in Bakuda explains Tamim, that our outward selves and our inner selves should be equal and balanced in the service of Hashem, that our heart, tongue and limbs should be consistent and each one should affirm the other. This gives us an understanding of the idea of Tamim as wholeness or completeness. There are people who we meet that essentially have three versions of themselves what they believe, what they say, and what they do. So let's take an everyday example. A person may believe that family should always come before work. However, when they talk to their boss, they say work comes first, you can always rely on me. Meanwhile, when they're at home with their family, they spend most of their time scrolling on their phone. Therefore what they actually do is prioritize neither their work nor family but their phone. A tamim is one person. Their heart, mouth and actions are aligned. There is consistency between what they believe, what they say, and what they do. During El, we often think about the Aveirop, the sins that we have committed, and how we can avoid doing so again. However, there is another question. Where are the gaps in my life? Is there a disconnect between what I say matters and what actually matters? Between the person that I want to be and the person that I am, between the Jew I am in public and the Jew I am in private, between the standards that I demand from others and the standards that I demand from myself. Completeness is when the person Hashem sees and the person everyone else sees increasingly becomes the same person. This gives Heshbon Hanfesh an accounting of the soul, the self-reflection that we undertake at this time of year, a very different character. So the first dimension of Temimut is wholeness within ourselves. My heart, my words and my actions should not be telling three different stories. But the Ramban now adds a second dimension. It's not only that I should not be divided within myself, my heart should also not be divided between Hashem and other powers. The Ramban in his Hassagot to Sefa Hamitsvot explains that Tamim means that we turn our heart exclusively to Hashem, that we believe that everything comes from Hashem alone. Therefore, we should not seek knowledge about the future from astrologers or anyone else. Everything is in the hands of Shemaim in heaven, and Hashem can change the stars and constellations according to his will. The Ramban says that when Hashem says to Avraham, Walk before me and be Tamim, it means that Avraham should not entertain in his heart that there is any truth whatsoever in anything other than Hashem. After all, while the rest of the world were worshipping idols or the sun, the moon and the stars, Avraham had come to the realization that everything was directed by Hashem. He stood alone, and it must it must not have been easy to be steadfast in his belief when the rest of the world thought otherwise. Sakovat Halavot, duties of the heart, teaches us that tamim completeness means not dividing yourself between your inner and outer self, but ensuring that your inner and outer identities are reflective of each other. The Ramban adds that Tamim wholeness also means not dividing your heart between Hashem and other powers. It's easy to begin treating our boss, the markets, politicians or circumstances as though they are independent sources of our destiny. They matter, but they're not sovereign. Hashem is. That is why the Pasak does not only say Tamim to Hir, you shall be Tamim, which points to our own wholeness of our inner and outer selves reflecting each other. But it also says Im Hashem Elokecha, with Hashem your God, which adds the dimension of not relying on anything beyond Hashem, knowing that it is Hashem who runs the world. In explaining why Avraham was told by Hashem, walk before me and be Tamim. The Ramban brings the Gomorrah in Shabbat 156, Ahmed Alaf. Avraham said to Hashem, I have looked at my astrological chart, and I'm not fit to have a son. And in the Pasak in Lechlacha, it says, And he took him outside. Hashem took Avraham outside, and that doesn't mean he took him into the garden. It means that he took him outside of the world. He was looking down on the world. And Hashem says to Avraham, Count the stars if you are able to count them. And he said to him, So shall your offspring be. Hashem is telling Avraham, go beyond your astrology. There's no constellation for Israel. In other words, it doesn't matter what the constellations say. Ultimately, everything comes from Hashem. So now we have two dimensions of wholeness. Chavot Halavovot says, Don't be divided within yourself. The Ramban says, Don't divide your trust between Hashem and other supposed powers. But the Orhaim now says something even more radical. He changes the Pasuk from simply being a command into almost a promise. So far we have been reading the Pasuk as a demand. Tamimti Im Hashem Elokecha, you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God. We must strive to be Tamim, whole or complete. The Orhain reads the Pasuk in a slightly different way. Im Hashem Elokecha, with Hashem your God, Tamimti Hiya, you shall be Tamim. In other words, if you are with Hashem, you will be Tamim, you will be complete, you will be whole, you will lack nothing. And the Ohachim also quotes the Gomorrah in Shabbata 156 Ahmed Alif concerning Avraham. Because Avraham was with Hashem, he was Tamim, he was complete, he was whole. So even though the constellations indicated that Avraham would not have a child, his destiny was overturned, and he did have a child because he was with Hashem. So often our incompleteness comes because we live in too many worlds. We seek the approval of others around us, family, friends, colleagues, sometimes even strangers. We want to satisfy social norms and society, ensuring we wear the right clothes, espouse the right opinions, get excited by the right things. We try and satisfy our own egos, ambitions, and desires. No wonder we're exhausted and fragmented and feel pulled between a multitude of different demands, requirements, and aspirations. The Oraha Chaim is explaining that to be complete, you only have to attach yourself to one center around which everything else can be ordered. Be with Hashem. Hashem isn't simply asking the fragmented human being to become whole. The Torah is telling us where wholeness and completeness can be found, and that is Im Hashem, with Hashem. That is now a third dimension. Wholeness is not only something I manufacture through self-improvement. Wholeness comes from having one centre around which the rest of life is organized. Im Hashem Elokecha, with Hashem your God. But there is still a problem. It's relatively easy to talk about wholeness when life is calm. What happens when life becomes complicated? Can a person remain whole when everything around them is pulling them apart? This is where Yakov Avinu becomes crucial. We are told in Pasha Toldo that Yaqov Ishtam Yoshev Ohalim, Yaqov was a Tamman dwelling in tents. Because the comparison the Pasak makes is with Aesaf, a skilled hunter, the Tum is often translated as simple rather than whole or complete. But Yaakov was not simple. It's not the case. The Gemara in Bhava Batra 123 Ahmed Alaf tells us that when Rachel told Yaakov that her father Lavan was a deceitful person, Yaakov said, I'm his brother in deceit. In other words, I can be equal to him. And sure enough, Yaqov was able to manage and to counter Lavan's deceit, so he came away after twenty years in Lavan's house unscathed. This is one of the lessons that we learn from Yaakov Avinu. He understands deceit. He understands manipulation. He encounters both Aesaf and Lavan. He experiences conflict, fear, bereavement, family tensions and uncertainty. And after everything, he remains Yaakov. He manages to stay whole and complete, being the person he's meant to be. This is what it means to be Tamim. Being Tamim is not going through life without hardship, challenge, and complexity. The world is challenging. We all face difficulties where we're not sure which is the right path to take. Being tamim, being whole or complete, is being able to go through complexity and challenge without allowing it to destroy your integrity. A young child can be whole because they have not yet discovered how complicated the world is. Being tamim is knowing exactly how complicated the world is and nevertheless refusing to become cynical. The highest form of innocence is not ignorance of challenge or complexity, it is surviving challenge and complexity without being corrupted by it. So now we have moved one stage further. Temimut is not simplicity because you have never encountered complexity. Temimut is integrity after you have encountered complexity. This is Yaakov Avinu. Despite the extremely challenging life that he faced, he managed to remain tamim, to remain whole, complete. In many ways, this is the challenge we all face. Our boss asks us to work too close to the beginning of Shabbat. Friends put pressure on us to attend an event that is inappropriate because everyone's going. An argument at shul is sucking people in to take sides or give opinions. Challenges with Panasa puts pressure on other activities that are necessary, such as attending shul or sticking to our learning schedule. It is when we face these challenges the question arises: can we remain tamim? Can we remain whole and complete and be the people that we are supposed to be, staying loyal to Torah, Jewish values, and Hashem? Until now we have looked at individuals, Noah, Avraham, Yaakov. But there was one moment in Jewish history when an entire nation achieved this kind of wholeness. When Hashem tells us, Tamim ti yeah, im Hashem elokecha, you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God. We have as a nation already experienced this before. The Gomorrah in Shabbat 88 Amabet, relating to when we said, Na'Asev and Ishma, we will do and then we will understand at Hasinai, quotes from Mishleh, to Ma' Isharim Tamchem. The completeness, wholeness of the upright will guide them. In other words, the people said Na seven Ishma are Hasinai, because they were complete a whole. That is, their values, intentions, actions, and words were completely aligned. Our Pasuk in this week's Pasha, Tamimti Im Hashem eloke, you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God. At Matan Torah, at Hasinai, the whole of Klalishrael was whole or complete with Hashem. The commitment of the people was not contingent on first comprehending everything. There could have been endless questions. What will this Torah demand? Where will it lead us? Will we be able to live up to it? But those unanswered questions did not fragment the relationship with Hashem. And so this gives us another element of Temimut. Wholeness does not mean having no questions. It means that the questions do not shatter the relationship. Today we live with any number of questions. Why did Hashem allow October the seventh to happen? Why are we experiencing a rise in anti-Semitism all over the world? Why is Hashem chosen to still not bring Meshiach? The questions are natural, but we can still be complete a whole with Hashem. In pursuit of answers to our questions as we learn and try and understand, we can become even closer to Hashem, not further away. That is tamim, completeness. But there is one final danger. Everything we have spoken about can itself become an act. I can look whole without being whole. I can sound full of Emuna without actually living with Emuna. That is why the word im with Hashem matters so much. Rabbi Pinchashira of Koretz, who was a Talmud of the Bal Shem Tov, says that there is no other mitzvah that requires us to do it im with Hashem. This is profound. Throughout Tanakh, we're commanded to fear Hashem, love Hashem, serve Hashem, cling to Hashem and walk in his ways. But there are two formulations where the religious quality itself is described as something we do with Hashem. In our Posak in Shoftim it says, Tamimti Im Hashem Elokecha, you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God. The second occurrence is in Mika. The Pasak tells us, The Hatsne Lechet im Elokecha, walk modestly with your God. Why are these the only two formulations when we are told to do something with Hashem? Rabbi Pinchashapiro says, because these two attributes, temimut, completeness, wholeness, and modesty, are the two attributes where we can easily deceive other people. A person can appear to be complete and whole in their Emuna and give the impression of being modest, even when they have a lack of Emuna and are far from modest. They can seem pious when really they are cynical and deceitful. For example, there are people who insist they need no Kavod, recognition or gratitude when contributing to the community, that it's all for Hashem. Yet when they don't receive the Kavod they expect, they go home and rage. Of course, while the rest of us can be fooled, Hashem knows the truth. Hashem sees into our hearts and souls. This of course echoes what it says in Chovot, Halavot, duties of the heart. People see the exterior, but Hashem sees the whole. Wholeness completeness does not mean being perfect. It does not mean knowing all the answers. Yaakov Avinu struggled and was an Ishtam, a whole man. Completeness is knowing who I am walking with, Hashem, while I wrestle with the questions. So the Torah has taken us somewhere very demanding. Temut is not an image I project, it is the person Hashem sees when nobody else is looking. So what have we discovered? Tamim does not mean perfect, it means whole. Chovotalavovot teaches us to bring our inner and outer selves together. The Ramban teaching us not to divide our trust between Hashem and other powers. The Yor Hakhaim teaches us that being with Hashem is itself what creates wholeness. And Yaqov teaches us that wholeness can survive complexity. Sinai teaches us that questions do not have to fracture commitment. And Ravpinchas Koretz teaches us that real wholeness is measured before Hashem, not before other people. And now we can understand what this Pasuk has to do with El. We often enter El with all the right intentions. I'm going to become a better person. This coming year I will never speak the Shankara, I will not become angry, I'll govern every service with Kavana, I'll do more learning every day, and I'll never waste time. Of course, within a few weeks the whole thing has collapsed because we confuse perfection with Teshuva. Our Pasuk, Tamim Tiye Im Hashem elokecha, you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God, tells us Hashem knows who we are. He knows our individual strength, weaknesses, history failures, and contradictions. Hashem is not asking us to pretend that those aspects of ourselves do not exist. He's asking us to bring the pieces together. Maybe this L, I won't become the biggest khala. Maybe I won't become the greatest person in the room, but perhaps I can repair one of the cuts. Close one gap. Make a part of my private life match what I profess publicly. Take one value that matters and make sure that I live it. Take one part of my relationship with Hashem which is mechanical and make it real. That is achievable. That's transformative. As we come into El, it is fitting to ask, what does Hashem expect from us, imperfect human beings? This week's Pasha Shoftim gives an extraordinary answer. Hashem does not ask us to arrive at El already flawless. He asks us to become whole. Noach teaches us that a human being can be called Tamim. Avraham teaches us that Tamimut means giving our heart completely to Hashem. Yaakov teaches us that we can remain whole even after life becomes complicated. At Sinai, Khal Yeshua El teaches us that commitment can remain whole even when understanding is incomplete. And now as we come into El and we start contemplating who we are and how we behave as we approach the Yamim Nora'im, Moshe turns to every Jew and says, Tamim ti hiye im Hashem Elokecha, you shall be Tamim with Hashem your God. Let your inside and your outside move closer together. Let your heart, your words, and your actions tell the same story. Don't allow disappointment to turn you cynical. Don't allow questions to sever your relationship with Hashem. Don't allow your failures to convince you that because you cannot be perfect, there is no point trying to become better. As the Orhaim explains, you will become whole when you are with Hashem. And perhaps that is what El is really about. Not arriving before Hashem and claiming, look how perfect I've become, but arriving before Hashem and saying, This is me. All of me, the successes and failures, the strength and weaknesses, the parts I'm proud of, and the parts I still need to repair. I'm not perfect, but I want all of me to belong to you. That is not perfection, that is temut, and perhaps that is what Hashem is asking from us, this L.